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Thursday, March 30, 2006

F.A.Q. #1

Q: What was your favorite interview?

A: The one that started it all: Ali. When I asked if he had any advice for the children of Holy Rosary School, he said, "Get your brains ready, because automation's takin' over. Choose your profession while you're young and start workin' towards it, like I did boxing at 12, and by the time you're in your 20s, you'll be well perfected." Alas, automation DID take over, so gettin' our brains ready was spot-on advice.

Q: What was your craziest interview?

A: Bo Diddley was angry at the world the night I got him on the phone, and he let me have it. He also began every sentence with, "Well, I'm 72 years old ..." Brian Wilson was there but he wasn't there. Michael J. Pollard is the master of the monosyllabic answer. I thought I could crack him -- I even boasted to his agent that I could crack him -- but he killed me with his amazing technique, making me work like a dog for scraps and smiling wanly the whole time.

Q: Who do you want to interview most that you haven't interviewed?

A: Boris Karloff.

Q: He's dead.

A: You didn't say he or she had to be living.

Q: What would you ask him?

A: "Remember that time you played Frankenstein? That was awesome."

Q: What LIVING person would you most want to interview?

A: Keith Richards. I did get three questions out of him on tape in a crowded bar once, but I've always coveted a proper, knock-down, drag-out interview.

Q: What would you ask him?

A: "Remember that time you recorded 'Satisfaction?' That was awesome."

Q: Shortest interview?

A: Ringo Starr, five minutes.

Q: Longest interview?

A: Larry Harmon, better known as Bozo the Clown and the cartoon voice of Stan Laurel. Ninety minutes. I should make that: Ninety minutes of fun.

Q: Do you record your interviews?

A: Is there any other way to ensure that you've got every syllable?

Q: Who was your most recent interview?

A: Tommy Chong, a cell-phone quickie. Here's what he had to say about serving time in federal prison for selling drug paraphernalia: "It was all an excuse. It just showed me and it should show America how frightened the Bush administration is of people like me, that they would have to spend that kind of money, go to that length, to try to shut me up." Read the rest this Sunday (April 2, 2006) on my CELEBS page in the Asbury Park Press and Home News Tribune.

Q: What interviews do you have coming up?

A: I have nothing scheduled at this moment, but I always have at least five or six "feelers" out. But being Irish and superstitious, I never talk about upcoming interviews. That's a surefire way to get a cancellation.

Q: Thank you for your time.

A: No, thank YOU.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Gail said...

Hey Mark, remeber the time you played Christmas songs through your nose? That was AWESOME.

7:56 PM, March 31, 2006  

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