GIG MEMORIES

We packed the house and we rocked the house. It was my best gig ever -- but I've been saying that the last three gigs, so I guess I'm just the Boy Who Cried Best Gig Ever.

We set up the night before. One thing you notice pretty quickly about the area -- there was a go-go bar called Cheerleaders next door. A few stops down, there was an adult book store. Across the street, there was ANOTHER adult book store. So this stretch of the highway, at least, was a mecca for, shall we say, aficionados of adult entertainment.

A heartbreaking (for me) technical setback was discovered during setup: My Guitarbug wireless unit was buzzing something awful. Which meant it couldn't be used. Which meant if "Tube Top" showed up again, I wouldn't be playing my guitar between her legs. I swore a blue streak, and then sucked it up. (P.S.: "Tube Top" was a no-show. Boo hoo.)

The next night, Mad Jack opened with "I Just Wanna Make Love to You." We connected intensely with the crowd. We nailed it. We were ferocious. We never played it like this before. It was the best single performance of any song I've ever played in my life, bar none. The room went immediately nuts. (But then it trailed off right away, and it took until our three-song finale to get it back up again.) At the end of "I Just Wanna Make Love to You," I remember thinking, "I'm done. I can't give anymore. That's all." But we had four hours to go.

There was no dressing room, but we had the next best thing: a tight little storage room off the stage with a door and a light. We made the most of it. We did quick changes and guitar-swappings amid shelves of cooking accessories, wine glasses, napkin boxes and one GIGANTIC olive jar. Between sets, I freshened up my eyeliner using the reflection from the lid of a catering heater.

The Burners opened with "Under My Thumb." It worked like a charm. Maestro's xylophone sound was eerie. Bad Bobby played some tasty stuff. Our "Dueling Godfathers" comedy routine was a noble flop (which was no surprise). "Let's Spend the Night Together" was magical. The six-song dance set worked as we'd hoped. I still had my wireless microphone, so I worked the long room, dragging people to the front. Once and future Burners singer Chris Walthy joined us onstage for two songs.

We had some local celebs in the audience, such as motorcycle customizer Biker Bobby, who designed a rideable motorcycle equipped with a useable stripper pole; founding Dead End Kids guitarist Kelly James; and lots of musicians from the South Jersey bar scene.

Six of us limped into a diner for omelettes at about 4 a.m. I still had my "racoon" eyes and black nail polish. Nobody in the diner flinched. They're quite accustomed to weekend weirdos.