Subscribe Now!
GannettUSA Today

Wednesday, January 24, 2007


Here's a formula I swear I came up with on my own. I did not read about it or find it on the Web or see it on TV. By the same token, I'm sure I'm not the first person to have stumbled onto this. Yet, anyone I've told it to has never heard it before.

Here it is:

The year when your age reaches half your parent's age, that's when you are the age your parent was when you were born.

I know it sounds simple, obvious, elementary. But I've never heard any one say it.

It works with any child and any parent. So if your sister turned turned 29, say, the year your father turned 58, that means your father was 29 the year your sister was born.

WOW, right?

Digging a little deeper into this formula: During the year your age reaches half of your parent's age, if you locate the exact halfway date between your birthdays, that is the day when YOU HAVE LIVED ON THIS EARTH THE EXACT SAME NUMBER OF DAYS YOUR PARENT LIVED ON THIS EARTH ON THE DAY YOU WERE BORN.

So if your mother was born on, say, March 23, 1969, and you were born on May 10, 1991, she was 22 when you were born. You will turn 22 in 2013, when she will turn 44. Your age will have reached half her age, which means that's how old she was when you were born. There are 48 days between March 23 and May 10, putting the halfway point between those dates at April 16. In this scenario, on April 16, 2013, YOU WILL HAVE LIVED ON THIS EARTH THE EXACT NUMBER OF DAYS YOUR MOTHER LIVED ON THIS EARTH ON THE DAY YOU WERE BORN.

There's more. If you know the exact time of day for both your mother's birth and your birth, and you pinpoint the halfway point between those times -- to the minute, now -- for April 16, 2013, YOU WILL HAVE LIVED ON THIS EARTH THE EXACT NUMBER OF MINUTES YOUR MOTHER LIVED ON THIS EARTH AT THE EXACT MINUTE YOU WERE BORN.

Freak . . . you . . . out.

Of course, thanks to this World Wide Web, there are thousands out there who can probably say, "Hey, buddy, this formula was first espoused in the 12th century by Henry Wadsworth Copernicus. Where've you been?" But just in case I AM the first, I've decided to name it. I've decided to name it after actor Larry Storch, who made us laugh as Agarn on "F Troop." Henceforth, I am calling it The Larry Storch Formula.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I did read your comment about the age thing, and I never thought about it or heard that before.
It is pretty amazing what you can do with numbers.

I am just curious if you went to
Glassboro College which now goes by Rowan University. And if you did go, did you go under a different name?

If you did go to said college,
did you work on a publication called Venue? and have a girlfriend named Carol? and chum around with Ken Smith, Doug Kirby,
C. Susie King as well as a host of other thouroughly cool people who also contributed to Venue.

Did you know a professor named
Michael Decilets (Spelling of name?)

Anyway, just curious.

4:24 PM, January 25, 2007  
Anonymous Class of 1980 said...

Dear Anonymous:

Everything you've mentioned has a very powerful ring of familiarity.

I do hope I never spilled beer on you at the Rathskeller.

10:48 PM, January 25, 2007  

Post a Comment

<< Home